Monday, September 28, 2009

I Saw A Spider

Yes tonight I saw a spider.

It’s at least 50 feet between the building I’m staying in and the one across the way. Yet he hung there… 40 feet above the ground, blowing in the wind.

If this had been Indiana, I’d say a storm was brewing. You know the feeling… A suspiciously warm night, a strong breeze coming in from the south… rain is coming, big storm. Big rain. But here in Southern California, phft, I don’t have a clue. This weather is… weird.

The spider.

He was blowing in the breeze, moving around at least two feet. Completely oblivious to the impending death that surly awaits him should he fall the 40 or so feet to the ground. But yet there he was, making his web. Working tirelessly to construct that which would sustain his life.

There was a point… somewhere.

I know, “What the f’hell?” Yet some how, for some reason, to me, it is… was profound.

Yes. I’m drunk.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

29.95

Sigh - when your 29.95 room comes with a fly-swatter. It should be obvious you're not going to sleep much... crickets. In the room. Under the bed. All night.

Oh, and now... no hot water.

If there was ever a sign I should just go back to bed, this is it.


Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

There’s a party at the Barn

It’s 12:30am Wednesday morning and I’m not sleeping again. Not sleepy… maybe choosing not to sleep. I’m actually not sure which.

Earlier today a friend posted on FB (by the way, that’s where I’m spending most of my time these days) he was headed up to the barn to get some ink done. Sigh. Sitting at my desk (it’s really a table, I don’t have a desk… and don’t even ask about ‘an office’) I pondered on that statement just long enough to get a lump in my throat.

I’m here, they’re there. And life goes on.

I may have to drink a bottle of Jack this weekend just so I can pretend I’m there.

If, somehow, someone, were to read this and happened to get the Barn Bunch together for a ‘biker’ style (you know, fingers, moons, maybe ‘twins’) group photo and sent it to me… I’d be really grateful.

Friday, June 19, 2009

In My Short Time Here In California

I’ve learned:

Traffic. No matter where you are from, where you have driven, the traffic in LA is unique. Here, the terms ‘defensive driving’ and ‘situational awareness’ have completely new depths of meaning.

It DOES rain in Southern California.

Palm trees, left to their own devices are gnarly. (note So Cal terminology) Nothing like you see in the post cards.

No matter how my day was, if I have to park more than 2 buildings away from my apartment, the day sucked. Yesterday (last night) I got a “notice of intent to impound” sticker on my car. I am in building L. I have had to park as far away as building A.

I get the heebe jeebes (we’re talking serious panic attack here) when traffic makes me stop on the highway under a bridge. All I can think about is “squashed like a pancake”…

The barbed wire on the sign poles is to keep people off the signs, not necessarily for birds. Some guy was on the news, being convicted of vandalism on (tagging) the big green highway signs. He did over $100,000 in damage. Said he climbed up on them at night and painted away.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Left Coast

Again, Not what I expected.

I expected a culture of hug the planet, save the trees, flow control faucets on everything, don’t drink sodas, only eat salads, you know, the left cost way of life. I also expected PC-ness to be running rampant.

From the people here, I have observed, they are worse than any Midwesterner. They litter, freely. We’re talking sandwich wrappers, empty cigarette boxes, multiple napkins… it’s almost disgusting. Use it, drop it out the car window. On the freeway, at traffic lights, in a parking lot… wherever they are.

There is fast food everywhere and everyone eats it. Now some times they tend to go for the ‘chuck-wagon’, (one of those traveling trucks that brings food to a business) What they get from there are fries with cheese, super sloppy burritos… all kinds of stuff that isn’t good for you.

Sidebar – the chuck wagon is more like a carnival food truck, not the little pick-up-with-a-heater-and-refrigerator like the other factory had. These have deep fryers, griddles, freezers and 2 or 3 workers in them. They must come from somewhere near by here because in the mornings, I see a half dozen of them on the road. Oh yea, they are here for breakfast too.

My apartment does not have flow control on the shower head. I was genuinely surprised to see this. The water pressure is great. I have the hot and cold valves turned less than one-eight of a turn and I can spray parts into my hair. Any more opening of the valves and I think the shower streams would cut my skin.

There are TV and radio commercials (PSA’s) telling everyone there is ‘mandatory water conservation’. Don’t hose of your driveway, take only 5-minute showers, fix broken sprinklers, etc.

PC – again, political correctness seems to be an elitist philosophy. Some customer name and or job name had something like fine china in the name. ho boy, you wouldn’t believe the vagina gags running around and being shouted over the walls. Funny, yes. Expected, no.

Maybe what I have been told is just from Hollywood. Maybe these people are too busy working and trying to get by in this crazy economy (like the rest of the country) to worry about what the Hollywood Elite seem to worry about. It’s kind of comforting but in the same since, it’s disheartening.

Being conservative doesn’t mean I’m not ecologically aware. I don’t litter, I try to eat right when time allows. And does any body really ‘hose’ off their driveway weekly or daily??

If I’m more conservation conscious than 70-80% of the left coast… what does that mean?

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Minority

That's me.

I went to Wal-Mart here the other day to get some supplies. You know, soap, paper towels, butter and such.

Anyway, standing in the checkout line I started looking around. First of all, the place was packed. Must have been 20 open register lines and all of them had at least 3 people waiting in line. It was paked like Christmas in Indiana. As I was scanning the crowd, just taking in the scenery, it hit me... black hair. OMG everyone here has black hair. That go me looking and I actually did find one guy with a ball cap on that might have had lighter hair.

Everyone else was latino or asian. I was the only 'white' guy.

The trend even carries on here to the new office. I AM the only white guy. There is one guy, Jesus, with red-black hair and the bleached blond/red latinos don't count.

Here it's not just appearance. It's language too. The owners speak hebrew, a couple guys in the office and a couple on the factory seem to speak it too. Then of course there is the spanish. In the middle of phone conservations they (the latinos) change back in fourth like it's the same language. On top of that, I know I've heard korean (seen it come off the printer too).

It really is amazing to listen to this modern day melting pot of cultures mix and enter act.


Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Monday, June 01, 2009

Work

So... Yesterday I drove to the new office just to get a feel for the directions and the time required. Took me about 25 min.

I figured a 2 to 3 times the time... this being LA and all. Nope. Took me 25 minutes. I'm an hour early. On top of that, no one is here... The place is empty.

Think they closed and went out of business without telling me?

Naaw, me neither...
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry