A Brother From Another Mother

I found this in drafts.  I wrote it right after attending Dave's funeral. I didn't publish it because... I don't remember now.  Needing it to be perfect comes to mind, now.  Dirt just needs to be remembered.

BFAM

July 5th, 2010, David “DirtBike” Bailey, left us to stand a flag line with the heroes in heaven.

My brother, Dave 'Dirt Bike' Bailey at 'Dave Fest '09'. Signing my sons chair. He was in Iraq and these were 'luxury' items he said they really missed.






After over a year long fight with his cancer alien, God chose to bring him home and give him peace. As sad as I am at Dirt’s passing, I know his pain has ended and he is at peace. I can’t help but smile at the thought of him greeting heroes with hugs, telling stories and just being a blessing to everyone that he meets.

Ride forever free my friend and crack open those pipes for me, the pipes you hear screaming in California are mine and they cry with me, missing you. NOT like a punk, like the true American patriot that you are. Know that you are already sorely missed and will never be forgotten.

(grinns) I can still hear Dave saying, ‘Ridin Til I Rot’ and ‘Aint going out like no punk’. He did both. I am blessed for knowing him.

God’s blessings and peace be with Janet, the family and his friends.

I Just Got Slapped In The Face

WOW!!!

Not really. Figuratively.

All my life, I always hated the fact that 'old' people resisted change.

"why do you need to be in the internet so much?","why do you have to have a pager", "I'll never use a cell phone and you don't need one" were just some of the jewels I grew up with.

Sometime there in my past I swore I'd always embrace new things… I've had a SLR digital camera for years. Cell phone, got it. Get a new one every time I can and always use the early upgrade. Camera phones, blackberry, full internet access. DVD recorder, got 2. Blue-ray, got it. 2-terra byte external storage hard drive, got one!

Today, I was asking for assistance in Word… 2007. I hate it, it's different, why did they mess with my WORD?! I could use MS Office products like nobody's business. Linking OLE objects, nesting data and graphs in Word then linking that to P-Point.

I was a Pro.

As I was grumbling about damn MS and changing the software, someone here quipped, 'damn MS for evolving!'

- - SMACK - -

*ouch*

I'm getting old . . . time to accept the new MS Office and stop resisting change.

Speedway Bill

A friend died last weekend. I am sadden by the loss and heartbroken that I could not return to Indiana for the funeral. The funeral was today.

I was there in spirit...

I've been thinking about him and his family all day.

I first met Bill in the summer of 2006. Memorial Day weekend. A 'come one, come all' invite had gone out to all Indiana Patriot Guard Riders to come on down to Speedway for a BBQ. For those that don't know, the Indianapolis 500 is actually not held in Indianapolis. It is in a small land locked town inside Indianapolis city limits called Speedway.

Bill and his family have lived there many years, 15 if I remember correctly. As I rode in on my '83 Shovel, making enough noise to wake the dead, Bill took notice and smiled. I walked over and introduced myself and immediately I was welcomed. "There's the food, the hog will be done about 6. The beer is in that cooler, soda in that one. Pull up a chair. Welcome." The same welcome happened several times and many new friendships were started.

We sat and chatted, under a checkerboard sign that read "Welcome Scuzy Mucks". A nick name given to the regulars that attended Bill's BBQs. I still smile when I say that name. I don't know that I ever fully became a 'Scuzzy Muck' to the other guys but to Bill, I was one of them.

Bill Mummert a.k.a. SpeedwayBill, was laid to rest today. His smile and selfless service for veterans and the Indiana Patriot Guard (IPG) will be greatly missed. Bill's family honored the IPG and invited us to attend his viewing and memorial service.

Rest in peace Bill and God's peace be with the family.

The Big Catch-Up

Where the Hell am I...?

If you’ve asked a question recently, the answer is probably here.

Party at the Barn –
After lots of big plans and many people coming, it finally happened. Not as many soldiers as we would have liked and not as many friends as I would have liked but it was a good time. The Corpsman brother came up and got some ink. I got mine finished… well the outside. We’ll see if and when I get to the inside. Brian (the tattoo’er) sketched out a concept. It’s gonna be cool!













The Corpsman . . . . . . . . . . . . . The Blogger
(click'm for big'm)

The son –
Reserve center on or about June 1, then training in the California desert. Then off to the sand box. Unemployment aside, this is going to be a tough year for me.

The Test –
I passed. I am an official state of Indiana licensed bartender. Should get some apps out today. We’ll see what happens.

JOB –
Good news, guess I have one. They want me to do the contract thing for 4 weeks, then make me an official offer.
Bad news, like I said below, it’s in California… Los Angeles.

Tom –
Sigh.
He has asked me to take him to the Nickel Plate (local Steelers bar). He knows he’s going to miss the ’09 season so he wants to go have some of the bar food ‘one last time’.
We’re going today.
God! I’m gonna miss him!

4 to 6 Weeks

Sigh…

It is amazing the range of emotions I go through while riding.

Tom was told last week, “the chemo is not helping anymore, we are going to stop it and make you comfortable. You have 4-6 weeks.”

No, I guess it wasn’t really that cold when he relayed the info to me but is was that abrupt, at least to me. Since this post in October of ’07. I had gotten used to him being sick and not dying. It’s been 18 months since that ‘Stage IV’ post and he’s still here, I had become complacent. Now …

When I left his house this evening, I was in a rage. If I could have gotten to a computer then, this would have been a VERY different post. But a bit of a ride and some tears on the inside of my ridding glasses and I don't need to kill anything. I want to remember. I want you to know.

***********************
I’d guess about 7 years ago we (me and my family) were a little tight for money. So, I got a second job. I think I was making $8 an hour as a cashier in a Shell station. As football season came around, I was grumpy that I was missing all of the football games, not just the Steelers. See, I was working 10 hours Saturday and Sunday, plus 8 hours 2 or 3 days a week making ‘the shell station’ almost another full time job.

On Sundays (with my Managers permission) I started bringing a 13 inch tv to work. I would at least get to watch whatever game was on the local airwaves. Amazingly, quite a few were Steelers games. Customers would loiter and watch the game for a few minutes, once they figured I was going to do this regularly some would drop their wives off to get groceries then ‘go get gas in the car’. Heh, amazingly ‘getting gas’ would take just as much time as the whole grocery trip. One of those regulars was Tom. He is a Steelers fan. We got to the point where he’d stop at Subway and bring us sandwiches for the late games. He was a Marine… we became friends.

Tom, my friend, this is going to be a tough month. For both of us. Like another friend of mine says, “you are where you are suppose to be”. I am so glad I decided to work at that gas station.

God bless, God’s peace. I will not forget you.

Update

Hey everyone!



Yes, I'm still alive. I survived the Blues Bash. Not for trying though. Looking back I was in a hurry to get my drink on. Too much of a hurry. I have no idea how much I drank... too much... too much shine, too much Jack and all WAY too fast.



Before the band finished it's first set I had fallen on some lady and was pretty much unconscious. (that is, I don't remember anything).



I have a couple pics... Guess i'll post them. I know there are more floating around. They'll have to be emailed to me... Maybe i'll post them too.



The job search is going slow. One company expressed interest but even that is waning. Plus I don't think I really want to move 1,400 miles east. Still have some money to make ends meet for a couple more months... I fear the recession will out last my cash reserves though. Wonder if I can get bailed out...?



PGR has been busy. We've had about 8 funerals in the last couple weeks. I RC'd Cpl Donte Whitworth. A very beautiful family. He was buried about ten miles from my house. Besides the Marine honor guard, a small group came in. Found out they (a Major, other Cpls and PFCs) were with Donte in Iraq. They were all home on leave but had come to Indy to be with Donte's family. To me, that speaks volumes about the character of the man.



Heading out (actually just got back...) to an IPGR members funeral this afternoon. He was killed earlier this week. Steve Ray. Owned a local pub and would often give a whole weekends profits to the PGR. He was killed when another driver turned left in front of him. Spoke with his kids (one daughter and two sons) this evening.



His older son (his name escapes me right now) said "he was doing what he loved. Riding on a nice day with friends. You can lie in a bed and wither away or you can just go... He preferred to go this way."



Stevie, you will be missed.



Hopefully this is the beginning of some regular posting and reading on my part. We'll see.



Please be safe and watch out for us riders, k? Thanks!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Has It Really Been a Year

I received this e-mail yesterday.

-------------------------------
From: info@patriotguard.org
Subject: PGR Forums - New Post RE: Mission Complete - Senior PGR Ride Captain, Greg Bowman, Princeton, IL., 14, 15 Sep 07
To: Indiana PGR members
Date: Monday, September 8, 2008, 3:58 PM
At 08 Sep 2008 2:58 PM a message was posted to a thread you were tracking.

RE: Mission Complete - Senior PGR Ride Captain, Greg Bowman, Princeton, IL., 14, 15 Sep 07
by Lawman747

It will be one Year tomorrow. Greg We could use you around here.


You will always be missed.
Dobbs

To view the complete thread and reply, please visit: http://www.patriotguard.org/ALLForums/tabid/61/view/topic/postid/634751/ptarget/967768/Default.aspx
-------------------------------

My first response was “a year, has it really been a year??” I cannot believe how much any one persons life or how much one family can be changed in 365 days.

It boggles, and humbles, the mind. I’m not going to rehash all of the events of the last year. Most of them are linked under the “Jeff Bowman” tag on the left. Even I haven’t had the heart to relay them all here. Go to Da BearzFan and check out the last 2 or 3 months.

Not a day goes by that I don’t say a prayer or a God bless for this family. Please join me.

Please, Stop by

Remember this, and this and this....

If you are of a mind, pray for my friends, the Bowmans. Go here, read, post a good thought....

PLEASE!!!

A Sad Day in the Burgh

I lived the first 18 or so years of my life in the Pittsburgh suburbs. Coraopolis, Moon, Beaver. I also lived through the 'Decade of Champions'. The years between 1970 and 1980 when Pittsburgh ruled the sports world.

The Steelers were;
AFC Central Division Champs: 1972, 1974, 1975, 1976, 1977, 1978, 1979,
AFC Conference Champs: 1974, 1975, 1978, 1979,
Super Bowl Champs: 1974 (IX), 1975 (X), 1978 (XIII), 1979 (XIV),
The Pirates were;
East division Champs: 1970, 1971, 1972, 1974, 1975, 1979
NL Pennant Champs: 1971, 1979
World Series Champs: 1971, 1979

Talk about cementing a young kids love for a city... growing up with champions like these was incredible.

Throughout all of the football years was a radio announcer, Myron Cope. Myron invented the Terrible Towel. If you have ever seen a Pittsburgh Steelers football game you have seen them. the Steelers Nation takes them to every game.

I still have my original one form the early-mid '70s. I also have a couple plane ones and three 35th anniversary ones.

Sadly, though, Wednesday the legend, the voice or Steelers radio, the man, died. Myron Cope... I spent so many Sundays in the car with mom and dad driving from our home in Moon Township to Tarentum to visit grandma. We always had the radio on to hear the Steelers game and Myron was there.

He will be missed greatly by me and the Steeler Nation that he helped create.

Amazing Progress

October 22nd I posted this. That was just over 10 weeks ago.

If you go over to the Bowman blog now, you can see a video of Jeff walking around!!!
His progress is astounding!! (it is on the left side, currently second image down.)

Please, stop by, wish him well, congratulate him on his progress. Tell him DNR sent you.

For those that are interested....

Gary, FIL... Friend

A few years after I was married, my mother in law divorced her husband. Don was a loud, pompous, self serving man. It needed to happen.

A few years after the divorce Fran met a new man, Gary. He swept her off her feet, in the classic and romantic courting her kind of way. He made her happy, she knew she was appreciated with him. After a couple years they married.

Gary was a great guy. Loved to laugh and loved showing Fran a good time. As the years passed Gary got sick. Lung disease. He was forced to be on oxygen and about a year ago he received a lung transplant. He had been on the transplant list for over a year and during that time the oxygen deprivation he suffered damaged his kidneys, liver and gall bladder.

For about 10 weeks now he has been in the hospital.

A few days ago Gary decide to not be on any life support systems. Expecting a rather immediate end people gathered and waited. The strength of the man prevailed and he lived, conscious, talking and visiting with family and friends for two more days.

Sunday December 23 at about 5 am Gary died in his sleep. On his terms, in his way he met his maker.

Gary, my friend, my father in law... you will be missed. Rest in peace.

DaBear - Jeff Bowman Update

Remember this post - here?

His family has been keeping a blof recording Jeff's progress for all of his extended family.

You have to go there and read this last post from Jeff's dad. I had chills, and tears.

Be Comfortable Riding or Don’t

I heard the other day that an acquaintance that rides with the PGR was selling his bike. His reason, “...to dangerous...”. In the Indiana PGR and locally we have had 4 or 5 deaths that are motor cycle related this year.

I know riding a motor cycle is dangerous. But is it any more dangerous this year than last year? I don’t think so.

So, what has changed? Why does a long time rider think there are more accidents or that it is more unsafe now than before?

Four years ago I personally knew 4 maybe 6 people that owned motor cycles. I did not own one, wouldn’t until the kids were mostly grown. The guys I knew rode only in great weather. The temperature had to be over 76 and below 90, no chance of rain, they left after 9 or 10 in the morning and were home way before dark.

Now... heh. I know at least a hundred riders and have acquaintance knowing (they know me and my name but I can’t remember theirs) for over 200. And these guys (me included) RIDE.

Some mornings we are up and on the road before 0400. There have been days that I didn’t get home till after mid-night. Rain, shine, fog, sleet, cold or heat. The only thing we won’t start out in is snow but if it starts once we are on the road.... we keep going, slower, but we keep going.

Is riding more dangerous now than before, no. We, the comfort and non riders of yester year know more riders than before. Those 4 or 6 guys might ride 10k miles all together in a season, the 100+ I know now will ride 10-12k miles each.

Hummm... what’s my point? Did I have one? Right now I’m not sure.

I will say this, if you are uncomfortable riding, for any reason. Stop.
If you are wigged out because a friend from Illinois was found dead along the road. Bike and body off in the grass found by chance by a jogger the next morning... Stop.
If the fact that a car swerving to go around another car turning right crosses the double yellow and sends another friend to the hospital in a coma eats at your stomach... Stop.
If knowing a drunk driver, semi unconscious can come up behind another acquaintance, strike his bike, knock him down, drag him a quarter of a mile under the pick-up truck killing him freaks you out... stop.

You’re gong to hurt yourself and maybe someone else. Maybe me.

Prayers Please

Remember this post... Greg Bowman died September 8th or 9th. this is a small bit of that other post.

During our quick dinner, it was decided that I *gulp* should present the flag to Mrs. Bowman... wow, this is more of an honor than I can describe. I’m glad it was about an hour to Princeton, IL because I spent the time composing my self and trying to find some words that might express what I was feeling and what needed to be said.

When we got there, the official service was over so we went to the Bowman’s house. About 25 members of the family were there and gathered around and I presented THE flag. It has never been harder for me to speak. I think I did ok.

Greg's brother Jeff was there. I remmeber the tears in his eyes as I presented the flag to his sister-in-law, Greg's wife. I remember a hug from him and thanks for bringing them THE flag.

Last night I recieved a call... coming home from another PGR mission... a car crossed the center line and hit Jeff head on... He's in a coma, it doesn't look good.

In the last year, this family has also lost a son due to PTSD from Iraq.

Please pray for him, for his family, his kids. PLEASE!!!

-------

Edit: corrected loss of son.

Stage 4, Grade 4, Level IV

Damn-it!!! Damn-it!!! Damn-it!!! Damn-it!!!

It’s bad enough having your kids not listen to you but now I think no one is listening. I said it here, everyone is to stop, k.

Another buddy, Tom, has cancer. damn-it!! Stage 4... the worst...
Vietnam Vet, father of 3, married 30 +/- years...
He’s not 60.
His wife calls me “Mr. Hells Angel”, his daughter calls me dad...
fuck-it!!!

He has less than 12 months.

God give me the strength to be there for him and his family.

Damn it all to hell!!!

Saturday - Side Bar

I had the distinct honor to stand with Jerry’s wife, Carol, Saturday. As hard as it was, it was great to see her. (Good-by Jerry, Today is Jerry’s funeral)

As I walked by heading inside the church, I saw here standing there off to the side, not going in. I know these missions are hard for her. I believe Jerry thought of us as family. She comes because he would have and she loves this family too. In my innocence, I asked her if she was going in. She said she would, with me. Needless to say, when Shawn’s wife spoke, saying what she said, it hit a cord with her. We bawled like babies.

Carol has made a promise, she is getting her motorcycle license and will be riding with us... on Jerry’s trike (click on the links, there are pics back there). She told me, “I’ve sat on it, in ‘his’ seat...” (good God, I’m such a fluff ball, I’m tearing up writing this). She had to stop and wipe away more tears. “That’s not where I belong”, she said. But he would be so proud of you, I thought... I should have said it. Don’t worry, I will next time.

He's Gonna Be OK!!!

The missus and I rode up to Elkhart, Indiana Saturday. I had to see Dirtbike. He looked good, good color, big smile, hugs all around. DB’s wife is putting him under house arrest for something around a week once he gets out (should have been out Saturday afternoon). I know he’s gonna go stir crazy but it will be good for him. He needs to rest. He says he had a ‘very’ accelerated (over 200) heart rate for a couple days (I so wanted to smack the shit outta him) before he called his daughter to drive him to the hospital.

I cannot tell you how much good it did my spirit to see him, to see him hop up out of the bed and greet us. Not knowing what to expect gave me an incredible lump in my throat as we approached his room. It was great to see him.

I offered to keep the oil warm in his bike... he said there was a half dozen other guys that were in front of me and several that had offered to take the custom flamed fairing and saddle bags off his hands if the Dr’s said he couldn’t ride anymore. LOL!! I think he is actually worried about his bike getting miles without him.

All in all it was a good ride. We stopped in Kokomo and had a late breakfast at Cracker Barrel on the way up. Covered the 120+/- miles in a little over 2 hours. The ride home was a little more relaxed, took about 3 hours. All together we covered 300 miles.

I’m so glad he’s gonna be ok.

All Right, Everybody, Just STOP!!!

I used to marvel at ‘older’ people when they would comment ‘I’ve been to the funeral of 4 friends this year’ and wonder naively, wow, four friends die in less than a year. What happened to them? I know what happened, they got old!!

With the PGR I’ve made many friends, most older than me. We go to these missions (PGR word for funeral) and see each other, we hug and cry (yes, damn it, bikers cry) seeing the sacrifice a family has made. Some people you get close to, others you know by site only.

A friend’s husband died a little over a year ago, another friend I’ve blogged about here and here is fighting cancer, one PGR member and friend got killed riding his bike in Tennessee, another died in his sleep the first of the year and my blodfather got me started doing this by having a heart attack.

Now I find out almost a week after the fact, Dirtbike, (a.k.a Dirtbag, or Douchebag) has had a ‘heart event’ (his words) and has been in the hospital for about a week. He lives near the Michigan line and not seeing him for weeks is not uncommon but to find out he has been in the hospital for a week was like getting hit by a truck.

I want to leave work NOW and go kick his motherfuckingass for not telling me. I swear to God if that little shit says anything like “I didn’t want to bother you’... as soon as he is better, I’m gonna fucking kill him!!!

DirtBag and Me

So what am I saying... Everybody (PGR friends, work frineds, and bloging friends) just stop!! No more getting older, no more ‘heart events’ no more cancer, no more making me feel like there’s a bike parked on my chest. My heart can’t take it.