A Difficult Decision

We make many decisions in our lives. Even many a day, drive faster, run a yellow light, wave someone out in front of us, hold the door open for someone as we enter a store. A lot of these decisions we make almost instantaneously, without even thinking.

Then there are the tough decisions. When I was a little kid the tough ones were, pick up a worm for the first time, ride my bike further than I had last week. As I age they get rougher. I spend a great deal of time researching options, reading reviews. All to be sure my decision is sound and won’t hurt me or my family financially, physically, etc.

Some of the big ones have been our house. It is our second, it is almost 3 times larger that our first. That was a huge step. Remember the commercial with the couple in bed laying face up staring at the ceiling saying “what have we done?” That was us, but once I decide, I try to go with it and ride it out. A recent big one was the new bike. I’ll bet I was smiling like a little kid bringing that thing home. The most recent is a new truck… it’s a big one. The missus will use it for SAR and for our dogs and it can haul the bike(s) if we want to go a long way and bring them along without riding. These were good decisions.

My most difficult decision was choosing to put a dear friend and family member to sleep. Russell was the best cat anyone could ever have. There was 3 choices, 3 times daily bathroom assistance from me, surgery that was more than my annual salary, or…. I still get a lump in my throat. In light of what others have had to decide, this was nothing.

A guy I worked with several years ago was diagnosed with testicular cancer. He decided to have one removed. That would be tough, but life or loose a family jewel… guess I would pick the same.

A friend of mine has been battling breast cancer for about a year now. Complete with 8 or 10 doses of chemo therapy, hair loss, radiation sickness, all of that wonderful stuff that you go through to maybe get better. Recently she has been in remission. In her diligence to know what was happening, she did a bunch of research and found that there is a genetic test one can have done. If the results are positive, it means you have a 50% more likely chance to develop recurring breast cancer.

*OMG NO!!!!!...*

She has the gene. Now what? Doctors advise it is not a death sentence ‘we just have to be careful’. An option another doctor advises… ‘complete, double and massive mastectomy’… This is an option?? Yeah, voluntarily have both breasts removed. Knowing this lady, her zest for life and constant up beat attitude… it’s not fair that she has to make this decision!!

Her decision, remove them. She said it all boils down to ‘life or death’. A 4 or 5 hour surgery including ‘re-construction’. It is done. She comes this weekend to stay with us and recover for about a week.

I pray I have the strength to comfort her and support her and cry with her if needed.