Thursday, November 13, 2008

Damn Dogs

My knees hurt.

About 5 years ago I had that arthroscopic surgery on my right knee. Should only be a 20-40 minute thing the doc says. heh, I was under for an hour and 45 minutes. Lots of damage, including an over stressed patella to quadriceps tendon. In order to alleviate that pressure he did some cutting up the muscle to let it stretch out some and relieve the stress my knee cap is/was placing on my knee joint.

I never did get my strength back and the 6+ weeks on crutches stressed the left knee bad enough that it needed attention then too. I never did get it looked at.

Recently, like over the summer, in fact it was the trip out west, before I met up with DC. I was at a business meeting and the group went bowling. I went bowling. Yea, it was fun but Sweet Mother Mary of God! I twisted something and both knees swelled up to the size of softballs, especially the right one. The stiffness and soreness added a little challenge to the week of riding.

After some weeks of babying it and the swelling was almost back to ‘normal’. Yes, it exists in a constant state of swollenness.

Which bring me to yesterday and the title, Damn Dogs.

(See here for my introductions of OD, ND and me)

OD still goes out with an invisible fence collar. ND still has to be escorted, that is to say, taken out on a leash.

So... yesterday I get home and take the dogs out. ND is fast enough and we get back inside in less than 5 minutes. OD is out back, looking for a leaf. Yea, he has a leaf fetish. He’ll walk around the yard in ever decreasing circles until he comes across the perfect leaf, then he will circle the leaf, half in the ‘crapping dog’ position, half in the ‘sniffing the best leaf in the world’ position until, phfft. He finally craps. This ballet can take 10-15 minutes.

I know this is what he is doing. So I’m waiting by the front door.

ND has a ball fetish. She won’t sit in your lap without holding a ball in her mouth. Even comes to eat carrying the ball and drops it next to her bowl. After she eats, she’ll bring the ball and insist you throw it for her till she throws up her food.

Anyway, back to me waiting at the door. ND bring me a ball. She’s too excited to just let go of it and I won’t tug with her with a ball. After a couple second she gives up and drops the ball at my feet and backs up about 4 feet, crouches down and gives the famous border collie ‘lock eye’ stare on the ball. So I kicked it. This is good. Gives me something to do while waiting on the OD to find the perfect leaf.

ND is so fast she usually catches the ball before it gets by her. No mater where I aim it or how hard I kick it, she catches it 99% of the time. After about 10 times of this, I’m thinking, “ok, ya little shit, see if you can catch this one”, and I rare back and clobber the ball....

If you have any bad joints and I say to you my knee ‘popped’ you know. If you don’t have bad joints or knees, how can I explain it... It’s kind of a many rice crispies or many bubble packing bubbles all going at once mixed in with a jab from a rusty spike. All of this sound isn’t so much heard as much as it is felt, through your whole skeleton.

When my foot came back to rest on the floor, I about fell over. It was like standing on a wet noodle. I have no photographic evidence but I’d swear it bent completely backwards and sideways before I regained my balance.

ND thinks my hoping around and groans are a call to play so she popping around like a Mexican jumping bean. Dropping the ball then, because I’m bent over, she races to get it so we can tug with the ball.

Quick enough, the spike dissolves and I can walk. OD comes to the door and all is right with the world... no issues. HA, Riiiiight!

Today, every time I get up from my desk, I am reminded...

DAMN Dogs.

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