Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Shopping 101

Guys - For those of you that get dragged to Wal Mart to ‘shop’, here are some fun things to do to break up the boredom.

Ladies - We will entertain ourselves, drag us along at your own risk.

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Take boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

Walk up to an employee and tell them in an official voice, "Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away."

Go to the Service Desk and put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

Move a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers they can come in if they will bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

When a clerk asks if they can help you he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

Look right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while picking your nose.

While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk where the antidepressants are.

Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the " Mission Impossible" theme.

In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look " by using different sizes of funnels.

Hide in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yell "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume a fetal position and scream "OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!"

Go into a fitting room, shut the Door, wait awhile, then yell very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!!!”

1 comment:

Freddie said...

These were pretty good.

My favorites: tomato juice and M&Ms.